


Hell Hath No Fury

by I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Au for Malec, Hurt Magnus Bane, Magnus Bane Needs A Hug, Past Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, no happy ending, the break up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-05-24 22:53:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14963748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own/pseuds/I_have_a_Mycroft_of_my_very_own
Summary: In an AU world, where Magnus and Alec have been dating in secret for two years, Alec still proposes to Lydia, and Magnus doesn't chase him down the aisle.There is no happy ending here.Edit: There might be happy ending here. Maybe.





	1. Swelling Rage

**Author's Note:**

> So I finally got around to the Break Up fic, and I totally lied!! There's no happy ending here!!
> 
> Alternate theme of this fic: Scars/To the New Boyfriend by Rudy Francisco 
> 
> Me: *writing Not Quite a Warlock and Love On His Arms*  
> Also me: Okay, but what if I did a break up fic?  
> Me: ... *writing break up fic*
> 
> In my mind, Luna is Luna Lovegood, but like, I can never get her voice correct, so... take that with a grain of salt. :)

_Can you lie next to her,_  
_And give her your heart, your heart,_  
_As well as your body?_  
_And can you lie next to her,_  
_And confess your love, your love,_  
_As well as your folly?_  
_And can you kneel before the king,_  
_And say I'm clean, I'm clean?_  
~White Blank Page, Mumford  & Sons

* * *

He seeks Lydia out three days after the wedding, when Alec is off organising their portal for the two-day honeymoon that he definitely knows absolutely _nothing_ about and wants to know even less about than that.

“Magnus.” Lydia says, smiling when she sees him, he gives her a polite smile and takes a deep breath in, letting it out slowly.

“I understand it’s customary for a Shadowhunter to give their intended their family ring when they propose.” Magnus tells her, pulling from his pocket the thing that he thought he’d never regret accepting. The thing that’s been burning a hole in his heart these last few weeks. “I don’t know what he gave you, but it should have been this.” He states, taking Lydia’s hand and pressing the ring into it, closing her fingers over it. When he lets go, she opens her hand and stares in shock at the ring, the gem embossed with the Lightwood family crest.

“Magnus, he gave you this?” she asks, voice little more than a whisper, Magnus shrugs.

“He gave you his name, so I figure that matters more in the grand scheme of things.” He answers, before snapping his fingers and waving his hand over the table beside her, a large box appearing in flickering blue flames. “This is everything he left in the loft. I figure he wants it back. Congratulations on your marriage, I hope the two of you can find a way to be happy.”

“Magnus-“

“And I just wanted to let you know that there may or may not be a High Warlock of Brooklyn when you come back. We’re still figuring out the numbers.”

“What do you mean? Where are you going?” Lydia asks, frowning. “Magnus-“

“I’m going to Edom. My father has offered myself and those of my kind sanctuary. You know, the Seelies have had the right idea all along, be somewhere your enemies can’t easily invade. I wish you all the luck in world in your fight against Valentine, but we Warlocks aren’t going to just sit around and let you or your rogues slaughter us like the last time. We all know Valentine is just doing the Clave’s dirty work, and now he has the Mortal Cup, and Jace Wayland. I think we all know who is winning.” Magnus explains, before forming a portal. “Give Alec my regards.” He says, before he steps through the portal, and isn’t seen again for five years.

* * *

The Warlocks are back for less than a week before the Clave gets wind of it, of course, they can’t track the Warlock’s down, they've learnt a few things in Hell. But Magnus has always been one for the spotlight, so when Pandemonium has it’s grand reopening, of course the Shadowhunters have to crash the party.

“Nephilim aren’t allowed in my clubs.” Magnus says, lazily, barely acknowledging the trio in front of him. “How about you return to your Institute and leave us to our fun, hmm?”

“Magnus.”

“Clary Fairchild-Morgenstern.” Magnus greets, sees the hurt that forms in Clary’s eyes, and looks away. “Get out.”

“The Clave wants-“

“I don’t particularly care what the Clave wants, Lightwood.” Magnus tells Izzy, turning to glare at her. “Never have, to be perfectly honest. We withdrew from the Accords when we went to Edom. I’m no longer required to be the Clave’s pet Warlock. Why don’t you tell them that for me?”

“Magnus, they just want to talk.” Jace tries, but Magnus rolls his eyes.

“I’ve heard that before, and then I had to bury my friends. No. _Now get out_.” Magnus says, waving his hand, and the next thing the Shadowhunters know, they’re freezing in the middle of the Arctic. “Luna, remind me to thank your father for that.”

“I’ll send him a present for you.” The female warlock replies, smirking.

“Thank you.”

* * *

“Did you have to give him the family ring?” Lydia snaps, arms crossed over her chest as she glares down into the park. “Honestly, Alec.”

“What do you want me to say?” Alec asks, throwing his hands in the air in frustration. “I loved him. I was planning to spend the rest of my life with him.”

“So why didn’t you?”

“You know why.” Alec replies, glaring. “I had a duty to the Clave.”

“You had a duty to him, too.” Lydia replies, sighing heavily and massaging her temples. “It’s different if you were just dating him, but you… you all but proposed to him. You gave him your _family ring,_ and he said _yes._ And then you went and married someone else! _”_

“I know.” Alec says, shaking his head. “It was stupid, I was scared. But I didn’t think he’d up and leave over it!”

“He didn’t just up and leave, he took all the Warlock’s with him! They’re unbound by the Accords, and what’s more they’ve had half a decade to learn magic at the feet of their parents. You think they’re ever going to come back under Clave control after this? Now there’s only the Vampires and the Werewolves under the Accords, and you know how close both of those factions are to breaking off.”

“I _know.”_

“You need to fix this, Alec.”

“Tell me how, tell me how and I’ll do it.”

“I want a divorce.”

* * *

He’s not really surprised when the cause of all his heartbreak shows up at Pandemonium, he almost lets his people deal with it, but figures it’ll start a war they don’t need if a Head of the New York Institute ends up dead on his dance floor.

“Get out. You’re not welcome here.”

“Your kind aren’t welcome.”

“You have a lot of nerve showing your face here after what you did.”

“I should rip out your heart, like you ripped out his!”

“Alright, that’s enough.” Magnus says with a sigh, breaking through the ring of angry warlocks, “Don’t the lot of you have drinking and dancing to be getting on with?” he asks, smirking when his people all throw Alec one last poisonous look before going about their way. Magnus looks at Alec, then turns on his heel and walks away, heading into the back rooms, where his office is. He doesn’t have to look to know that Alec is following him. “Perhaps you didn’t get the memo, but Nephilim are no longer welcome at Pandemonium.” Magnus tells Alec, as he waves the door shut behind them with his magic.

“I just wanted to talk, and we can’t track any of you.”

“No, of course not. We learnt a few things Down Under, so to speak.” Magnus explains, grinning. “If any of your Shadowhunters go rogue again, we’ll save us all the trouble and put them down immediately with the minimum of fuss.”

“You’ve changed.”

“Yes, that tends to happen as one grows older.” Magnus replies, smiling pleasantly. “It remains to be seen if you have.”

“Why did you leave?” Alec questions, the room starts shaking, and Magnus takes a very deep breath in, closes his eyes, and breathes out slowly, it takes a few moments before the room stops shaking and he clears his throat, opens his eyes.

“Did you forget the part where you broke up with me and proposed to another person in the span of about an hour?” Magnus asks, voice turning cold. “Because I didn’t forget that. I’m sorry, but was I just supposed to sit around watching the man I love play house with a woman he doesn’t even love?”

“I had a duty.”

“So, did I.” Magnus answers, a sardonic smile on his face. “Only my duty was to save my people, what was yours? I wasn’t aware your marriage was _so_ important in your war against Valentine. You have my sincerest apologies, Alec, for not giving your sacrifice the respect it deserved. How you must have _suffered_ for the Downworld.” Magnus says, voice become vicious.

“Everything alright in there, boss?” Luna’s voice asks through the door, Magnus takes a breath in, blinks away the angry tears that have formed in his eyes.

“Everything’s fine, Moonbeam, just meeting with a Clave representative.” Magnus replies, manages to keep his voice steady, even though he feels anything but calm.

“Explains the shaking. Let me know if you need me to get rid of the body, I’m sure Jinxy would _love_ to try roasted Shadowhunter.” Luna says, her voice fading away as she leaves them to it, Magnus laughs and rolls his eyes, turns his attention back to Alec, and the amusement dies a quick death.

“You shouldn’t have come.”

“How can I fix this?” Alec asks, desperate.

“You can’t.” Magnus replies, a sad smile on his face. “There’s no place in my heart for you, Alec, not anymore.”

“Magnus, there has to be a way for me to fix this.” Alec pleads, but Magnus just shakes his head.

“Just time. Maybe I’ll be able to forgive you in time, but I will never forget. Even if we were to get back together, I’d never trust anything you said, because you left me once, in a heartbeat, for your precious Clave, what would keep you from doing it again? No. There’s nothing you can do, Alec. You already made your choice. You shouldn’t have come here.” Magnus says, his voice quiet and despondent. “Leave, and don’t come back.”

“Magnus!”

 _“Get out!”_ Magnus snaps, forming a portal and throwing it at Alec. The moment the Shadowhunter is gone, he breaks down, collapses to the floor in tears, and doesn’t even try to control his magic when the room starts shaking again.

“I’m gonna bury him.” Luna’s voice says, as arms wrap around him. “I’ll bury him at sea, they’ll never find him!” Magnus gives a hysteric laugh and clings to her so, so tightly.

“I should have never come back.”

“I mean, you could go back to Edom, but do you _really_ wanna watch your dad and mine pine over the good old days?” Luna asks, making a face. Magnus scowls.

“Ugh, don’t remind me.”

“Yeah, didn’t think so.” Luna replies, beaming. “You think we should tell them Lucifer broke out? Or you think their precious Angel will tell them?”

“They’ll figure it out.” Magnus replies, shrugging his shoulders. “Why should we care if he comes for them with hellfire? Haven’t they brought it on themselves? Isn’t that what they’re here for? To hunt demons?”

“True, but you’re really not worried about Cupid burning?”

“He made his choice.” Magnus says, ignores the pain that shoots through his heart at the words. “He made his bed, now it is time for him to lie in it.”

“If you’re sure, you know my father will not show any of them mercy.” Luna cautions, Magnus takes a shaking breath in and lets it out again.

“I’m Icarus, Moonbeam. I’ve already flown too close to the sun. I’m not going to let it burn me again. Besides, if we tell them, they’ll just find a way to do away with your father, do you want that?”

“I’ll lay this entire world to ashes for him.” Luna promises, her wings becoming visible as her glamour fails. “I’ll do what he could not and destroy them all, if they even touch him.”

“I made my choice when I went to Edom, and I didn’t choose Cupid.” Magnus whispers, voice breaking. “Things could have been so different.”

“He made the first move, Magnus. He chose the Clave over you. Don’t forgot that.”

“How could I ever?” Magnus asks, tears sparkling in his eyes. “I’m never going to forget.”

“Good. Now come on, let’s go and enjoy the rest of the night.” Luna says, pulling him to his feet. “I’ll even get you drunk, if you want.”

“You’re on!” Magnus exclaims, grinning as he lets Luna drag him back out onto the dance floor.

When the hellfire comes, he’ll test his resolve, but for now, he’ll enjoy the time they all have left.

* * *

 _Tell me now, where was my fault,_  
_In loving you with my whole heart?_  
_Oh tell me now, where was my fault,_  
_In loving you with my whole heart?  
A white blank page and a swelling rage, rage._  
_You did not think when you sent me to the brink, to the brink._  
_You desired my attention but denied my affections, my affections._  
~White Blank Page, Mumford  & Sons


	2. What's Done Cannot Be Undone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Asmodeus pays Alec a little visit, Lucifer is perplexed to be the scariest person in the room

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this was supposed to be a one-shot, because I already have three other series/fics on the go, but... dammit guys!!
> 
> Asmodeus is the demonic representation of Lust. He's countered by Uriel, the angelic representation of Chastity. Lucifer is the demonic representation of Pride, he's countered by Raphael, the angelic representation of Humility. There are seven Archangels, and Seven Heavenly Virtues, just as there are seven Princes of Hell, and Seven Deadly Sins.
> 
> Lucifer played by the gorgeous Dean O'Gorman, my homeboy!!

_Holy water cannot help you now,_  
_Thousand armies couldn't keep me out._  
_I don't want your money,_  
_I don't want your crown._  
_See, I've come to burn your kingdom down._  
~Seven Devils, Florence  & the Machine

* * *

Alec retreats to his office after a long day of fighting demons, there’s been an increase in the numbers over the last few weeks, especially since the Warlock’s came back, and he doesn’t want to point any fingers, but he knows the Clave definitely is. He walks through the door into his office, rubbing at his forehead and comes to a sudden stop, the door swinging shut behind him, and locking with an eerie click. He frowns at the Asian man sitting sideways in his chair, legs dangling over the armrest, the man glances at Alec and smirks.

“Nice of you to join us, Mr. Lightwood.” He says, voice pleasant and soft, movement out of the corner of Alec’s eye causes him to turn, and he sees another man, shorter, Caucasian, perusing Alec’s bookshelf.

“How did you get in here?” Alec asks, frowning at the both of them, the Asian man grins, and flutters his fingers at Alec.

“Magic.” He replies, glancing at the door when someone starts frantically knocking at it, pulling desperately at the handle. Alec turns to the door, tries to unlock it but finds the lock secure behind an intricate ward.

“Alec, Alec, there’s a demon in the Institute! The necklace is going mad, but the wards aren’t activating! Alec!” Izzy yells, banging on the door, Alec’s entire body freezes, and he slowly turns to his visitors. The Asian man’s smile has turned vicious and between one blink of his eyes and the next, suddenly Alec is staring into familiar golden cat’s eyes.

“It’s alright, Izzy.” Alec calls, refusing to take his eyes off Magnus’ father. “It’s a false alarm, the demon is contained.” He says, because he knows why the wards aren’t reacting, he knows that Magnus’ magic would never react in anger against Asmodeus, because it is the same magic, shared between them both, familial, like recognizing like.

“What are you doing Alec?” Izzy asks, trying the door handle again.

“What is required. Leave me be, Izzy.” Alec tells her, glances at the other man, no, the other _demon,_ and finds him reading one of Alec’s books.

“Don’t mind me, little Shadowhunter, I’m just here for the entertainment.” The demon says, without looking up. Alec swallows thickly and turns his full attention back to Asmodeus as he hears Izzy stomping away.

“What can I do for the Lord of Edom?” Alec asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You could do many things, Shadowhunter.” Asmodeus states, hellfire forming on his palm, licking at his skin. Alec feels the heat even from this distance, he barely resists the urge to cringe away from it. “You could burn for eternity, that would please me greatly. But we both know that’s not on the cards for you. No, not for a Shadowhunter destined for heaven from the day of his birth, no matter how far he falls in life.”

“Is this about Magnus?” Alec questions, sighing heavily. “Look, I made a mistake and-“

“Oh, a mistake, brother, did you hear him?” the unknown demon calls, laughing dangerously as he glances up from the book to stare incredulously at Asmodeus. “You break a man’s heart, betray him mind, body, and soul, and it’s a _mistake_? Perhaps the humans weren’t the problem after all, perhaps _we_ were? That’s _such_ a divine response.”

“Hush, Luci, you’re here for the entertainment.” Asmodeus says, waving the other demon away, the demon hums and goes back to the book, while Asmodeus narrows his eyes at Alec. “Though he does have a good point. A mistake is forgetting your wallet at work, a mistake is forgetting to turn off the element, a mistake is _not_ purposefully and willfully breaking a man’s heart for the crime of loving you _too much.”_

“You think I broke up with Magnus because he loved me too much?” Alec exclaims, shaking his head. “That’s mad.”

“I think you got scared. Little Shadowhunter still in his closet, but his Downworld boyfriend makes him want to come out, oh, how can he get out of this? Oh, I know, break up with the very male Downworlder, and marry the beautiful, very female Shadowhunter. No one need _ever_ know his secret. That’s _not_ a mistake, Heartless One, that’s premeditated assault.” Asmodeus points out, Alec flinches, and Asmodeus laughs. “Aww, did I hit a nerve?”

“Stop toying with the boy, Asmodeus, our children await us.” The as yet unknown demon snaps, the book bursting into flames in his hand and quickly turning to ashes, which he pours on the floor.

“You’ve grown impatient in your old age, Lucifer.” Asmodeus says, glaring at the other demon, and Alec’s heart stops beating.

“Lu-Lucifer?” Alec whispers, choking on the name.

“Oh, Raziel hasn’t told you, yet? It’s been a _month._ Typical little brother.” Lucifer coos, before he starts laughing. “Guess he doesn’t care if I burn this world like I intended. But that was _so_ two hundred thousand years ago. Now I’m all about sitting back and letting you lot destroy yourselves. Isn’t that fun? A little lie here, a little lie there, and. You. All. Fall. Down.” Lucifer sing-songs, frowning when Alec just stares at him in complete horror. “How come he’s not terrified of _you_ , but I scare him speechless?” Lucifer questions Asmodeus, raising an eyebrow at him.

“Of all of us, your reputation is the most fearsome and well known.” Asmodeus answers, shrugging his shoulders dispassionately.

“As, you literally turn people’s genitals inside out!” Lucifer retorts, making a face. “And they think _I’m_ the scary one? All I wanted to do was burn some sense into people!”

“Look, you know what humans are like, Luci. There’s a reason you hated them.” Asmodeus points out, shaking his head and righting himself in the chair, rolling his eyes.

“Yeah _, two hundred thousand years ago_ , when they were smashing each other to death with _rocks,_ and doing little else with their lives. Now, they’re just _interesting_. Look how far they came! I mean, yes, they still murder each other all the time, but that’s not all they’re about now! It’s wonderful! They’ve been to the _moon!_ ” Lucifer yells, eyes shining with intrigue, then he looks at Alec and wrinkles his nose. “Raziel’s little experiments, though? They leave a great deal to be desired. You think I could be a hero in the story for once if I get rid of them?”

“Yes.”

“Hmm, I’m tempted.” Lucifer acknowledges, before sighing heavily. “But it’d be doing them a favour, too. Can’t let them go running for heaven after living a life of sin, oh, no, no, no. That’s too easy.”

“Good, if I get my way, this one will live in such agony, that he’ll throw himself out of heaven when he finally gets there, believing himself unworthy.” Asmodeus growls, Alec flinches away.

“Oh, As, you always were the vindictive type.” Lucifer tuts, but there’s a smile on his face. “How about we send the demons back on home to their families, and we cause havoc all on our own? Just the Seven of us, like old times?” Lucifer asks, raising an eyebrow, Asmodeus gives a devilish grin, and inclines his head.

“There will be blood.” He says, creating a portal, Lucifer laughs the laugh of the mad and steps through the portal. Asmodeus narrows his eyes at Alec “Don’t get too comfortable, we’re not done, you and I. They say payback is a bitch, well they never met _me_.” Asmodeus promises, before he, too, steps through the portal and is gone. The moment the portal fades, Alec faints dead away, it’s not every day you meet Lucifer Morning Star and live to tell the tale, after-all.

* * *

_They can keep me out,_  
_'Til I tear the walls,_  
_'Til I take your heart_  
_And take your soul._  
_For what has been done,_  
_Cannot be undone,_  
_In the evil's heart,_  
_In the evil's soul._  
~Seven Devils, Florence + the Machine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so apparently Asmodeus name means 'wrath demon' which is hilarious cos he not the representation of wrath, he the representation of Lust. There's also reference to him being 'the worst of all demons', so I'm over here like 'dang, Alec, talk about a death wish!!'


	3. The Trick the Devil Did

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seven have a bit of fun, and Asmodeus puts himself on Magnus' shit list

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm crying, my computer decided to die on me last night for unknown reasons (WIndows, wtf) and now it's working again, but apparently the documents for Not Quite A Warlock and Love On His Arms are corrupted and won't open or some shit?!?! THEY'rE SAVED ON ETH CLOUD! HOW CAN THEY BE CORRUPTED?! So I'm currently trying to fix that and now I'm annoyed.
> 
> People under the influence of Lust Magic. Lust can be a desire for anything, not just carnal desires. 
> 
> Things to note for this chapter:  
> Asmodeus: Lust  
> Mammon: Greed

_The trick the Devil did,_   
_The trick the Devil did,_   
_The trick the Devil did,_   
_Was make me want it._

_And I can't resist anything of temptation._  
 _Oh no, I'm fighting for my soul,_  
 _I'm ready for the battle, most things I can handle._  
~Trick the Devil Did, Sick Puppies  


* * *

“Okay. cousin, please don’t freak out.” Luna says, as she enters the loft, Magnus pauses in the process of making himself a drink and stares at her like she’s just said the dumbest thing in the world.

“Luna, Moonbeam, we’ve talked about this. If you don’t want me to have a heart attack, please don’t start conversations with ‘don’t freak out’. It’s almost as bad as ‘we have to talk’, or when dad uses my full name!” he exclaims, before turning his attention back to the alcohol. “Now, continue.”

“The Seven have risen.”

“Excuse me?” Magnus asks, putting his drink down and turning to stare at Luna in shock. “ _The_ Seven?”

“Yes. The Princes once more walk the earth.” She tells him, before sighing heavily and pinching the bridge of her nose. “They are currently having a competition. ‘Who can maim the most Shadowhunters using only their Vices?’”

“You’re kidding.”

“No.” the quiet word is all it takes for Magnus to conjure himself a pen and quickly scribble out a message on his arm, when he’s finished, he banishes the pen back wherever it came from, and holds his now empty hand out, lets hellfire form in his palm, then he presses the hellfire over the message, running his hand up his arm, until the message burns and vanishes, leaving unblemished skin behind.

“If I’m going to give Alexander time to earn my forgiveness, he can’t be _dead!”_ Magnus snaps at Luna, who laughs.

“Cupid strikes again.” She tells him rolling her eyes. “Well, I’d better go let Cat and the others know.” She says, forming a portal. “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, Magnus.” Is her parting remark, as she steps through the portal.

* * *

Alec steps out of his office into chaos. All over the Institute, Shadowhunters are running around after each other screaming and brandishing weapons or trying to get into each other’s pants. They ignore every single command Alec gives them and refuse to even acknowledge his presence as he makes his way to the command centre.

“I will have you, or no one will!” a deranged voice shrieks as Alec steps into the room, he leaps back in surprise, just in time to miss the dagger that sails through the air where his head had been a second earlier. “ _You’re mine!”_ the voice shrieks again, and Alec ducks yet another dagger.

“What is going on?” Alec demands over the chaotic control room, but no one has any details for him, too busy screaming at, fighting or trying to become each other to pay attention to him. He avoids the deranged Shadowhunter rushing after him, vaguely recalls their name as Erica, and flees out the door of the Institute, into the serene park. Then he’s hit with an intense desire to find Magnus, be with Magnus. Magnus is his. Magnus has always been his. He has to find Magnus.

He stumbles away from the Institute, off into New York with no idea where exactly he’s going but knowing who he’s after.

“Magnus. Have to find Magnus. He’s mine. Have to find him. Have to tell him.” Alec mumbles, activating his stealth rune and disappearing into the Mundane world.

* * *

“I’m winning, I have the _entire_ New York Institute, bar one sleeping Head, craving.” Asmodeus gloats over the magical connection to the other Princes. “The _entire_ Institute.”

“I went to have fun in Idris, but they’re already entrenched within my Vice.” Mammon comments, smug. “Doesn’t that mean I’m ahead?” Asmodeus laughs, before grunting in pain and tearing at his left sleeve to reveal a Hell Message burned into his arm.

_Do not kill him._

Asmodeus rolls his eyes at the message, trust his fool son to still carry the torch. He doesn’t deign to respond, but when he notices the Heartless One fleeing the Institute, an idea forms in his mind, and he grins mischievously and lets his magic wash over Alec. _Give in to all that you desire. You are but a slave to it. Let it burn._ He murmurs the binding words, words he’s repeated at least a hundred times today, and over a hundred thousand times over the millennia. He hums and throws in a little extra.

Magnus may never forgive him for this, but his only commandment was that thou shalt not kill, so he only has himself to blame.

* * *

“Have to find Magnus.” He murmurs as his feet lead him to a familiar loft, a loft he can’t believe he ever forgot how to find because he practically lived here five years ago, and for the last month he’s had no memory of how to get here, but he’s here now. “Magnus. Have to talk to Magnus. He’s mine. Mine. If I can’t have him, I want no one else. I want _nothing._ ”

Getting from outside the loft to inside the loft, at Magnus’ door is a complete and utter blur that Alec doesn’t concern himself with, his only thought is Magnus as he reaches for the door handle, only to scream and pull his hand back when Magnus’ ward becomes visible in front of him, pulsing an angry red. Alec takes a gasping breath in and looks at his blackened and burned fingers.

The door is pulled open with a violence Alec has seen only sparsely in his life, and suddenly Magnus is there, staring at him, at his hands, then at the still pulsing red wards in confusion, like he doesn’t understand the scene he is seeing.

“Alexander?” Alec takes a deep breath in and lets it out. “How did you find me?”

“Magnus, you’re mine, Magnus. I love you. I want you. You’re all I think about. You’re mine. If I can’t have you, then I don't want life.” Alec breathes, reaching forward again, screaming once more when his skin comes in contact with the ward. “You’re mine, Magnus.”

“I’m going to commit patricide, _again._ ” Magnus says, faux-pleasantly, Alec frowns at him in confusion before the fog on his mind is back. _Magnus, Magnus, Magnus._

 _“You’re mine.”_ Alec growls, reaching forward again, Magnus hisses and reaches through the wards to shove Alec’s hands away.

“Would you stop that?! The wards are punitive, you fool.” He snaps, he throws healing magic at Alec’s hands and then places a magical barrier between Alec and the ward line. “It’s lovely to see you, Alexander, but we’ve already had this discussion. You broke up with me, and I don’t want you back.” Magnus tells him, narrowing his eyes. “I don’t know what game my father thinks he’s playing with the both of us, but I’m over it.”

“Magnus, you’re mine, you’ve always been mine, and I’ve always been yours. We always find our way back to each other, Magnus. You can’t deny this, Magnus.” Alec says, loving the way Magnus’ name sounds on his tongue. “Magnus, Magnus, Magnus.”

“By Lilith, you’re Lust Drunk.” Magnus groans, rubbing tiredly at his face.

* * *

“Okay, come in.” Magnus says, after what he thinks might actually have been a hundred years, stepping back into the loft, bringing down the barrier, and then the ward, against his better judgement. The moment Alec’s inside, his hands are all over Magnus, who simply grabs his wrists and holds them tight, Alec struggling in his hold. “You’re just going to have to sweat it out.” Magnus tells him, sighing. _Sweat it out and we’ll never speak of this again._ He pulls him down the hall to the guest bedroom and shoves him inside, closing the door behind him and locking it, sealing it behind as many wards as he can think of. “I have to go make sure the Institute is still standing.” Magnus says, as he hears Alec banging on the door, screaming his name. Magnus sighs and rubs at his head. “You stay here, like a good little Lust Drunk, and get over yourself. I’ll be back, and hopefully you’ll be better, and we’ll never, ever, _ever_ speak of this clusterfuck again.” Magnus tells him, forming a portal and stepping through. “I’m going to kill my father.”

Strewn about the Institute are bleeding and broken Shadowhunters, all of them breathing, but looking like they went up against a Greater Demon, and lost, which is entirely accurate to the situation. Interspersed with them are the couples doing their best to devour each other, without a care for who sees them. Magnus sighs, locks down the wards and begins magically freezing anyone he comes across, clothing the ones who’ve given into their carnal desires a little too much, and healing the others. He’s relieved to note they’re not Lust Drunk, just high on their own primal desires, whatever they may be.

“Biscuit!” He exclaims, scandalised when he comes across Clary and Jace in the corridor outside Jace’s room. “The room is right _there.”_ He snaps as he magics clothing at them and vows to burn the memory from his mind later as he continues on, decides it’s a good thing Simon miraculously became a Daylighter while they were gone, when he finds him and Izzy getting handsy in a bay window. “I do not need to know this much about your assorted sex lives. We’re, none of us, ever speaking of this!!” he hisses at them, as he conjures clothing for them, too. “Honestly. I’m going to murder my father!!”

“That’s not very nice.” A familiar voice says behind him, Magnus turns to glare at his father.

“You couldn’t have chosen an Institute where I don’t have friends?” Magnus snaps at him, throwing a stasis charm through an open doorway at a couple of Shadowhunters giggling in one of the bed rooms. “Or… _had_ … friends? Or... whatever!” Magnus exclaims, annoyed at the English language and the entire situation, and also his own damned self for not just letting this all play out. Why should he care if the Shadowhunters make fools of themselves? _Because some of them are your friends_ a treacherous little voice whispers in the back of his mind, and he stomps on it, hard. 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Asmodeus asks, raising an eyebrow. “Besides, you forbade me from killing _him,_ nothing more.”

“Go throw you Vice around in Idris, Lilith knows they need it!”

“That’s actually not a bad idea…” Asmodeus replies, apparently genuinely considering it. “I think I will. How else am I to beat Mammon?” he questions, forming a portal, before he step through he frowns at Magnus. "He's not your responsibility, tear his heart out and move on." He tells Magnus, before stepping through and disappearing. Magnus shoulders slump with relief, ignoring his father's parting comment, before he goes through the rest of the Institute, freezing and healing the last remaining Shadowhunters.

“Alright, Shadowhunters, you’re all going to be locked in stasis for the next… three hours, then the spell will end, and you’ll be yourselves again. The Institute is locked down, so no one is getting in or out. Enjoy your stasis.” He tells them, voice magically projecting through the old cathedral, then he creates his own portal back home and steps through.

Where Alec is still screaming his name, if only he could stasis _him._

* * *

 

_Long odds, longer road,_   
_Up ahead, we're all alone._   
_And what I want, is what I'm owed,_   
_Too late to stay, too late to go._

_The trick the Devil did,_   
_The trick the Devil did,_   
_The trick the Devil did,_   
_Was make me want it._

~The Trick the Devil Did, Sick Puppies.


	4. Jar of Hearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which angry words are spoken

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Discussion of suicide attempts
> 
> I have a whole playlist set up for this fic and everything, honestly. But I have two conflicting ideas of where to take this fic, one Magnus and Alec get back together, and one they do not and I can't decide what I want... :/ Which... is why I haven't really done much for this fic yet, but I'm having a fight with the Wedding chapter for Tell Me All About the Ocean so...
> 
> Ragnor and Dot are alive in this. :)

  _No, I can't take one more step towards you,_  
_'Cause all that's waiting is regret._  
_Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore?_  
_You lost the love I loved the most,  
I learned to live, half alive,_  
_And now you want me one more time.  
Who do you think you are?_  
_Runnin' 'round leaving scars,_  
_Collecting your jar of hearts,_  
_And tearing love apart._  
~Jar of Hearts, Christina Perri

* * *

“Alright, Shadowhunter, you’re sprung.” Magnus says early the next morning, after a long, loud evening, having torn down his wards and unlocked the guest room. Alec scrambles to his feet, staring intently at Magnus, who frowns. “Or maybe not?” the Warlock asks, throwing a diagnostic at Alec, his frown deepening. “No, you’re definitely yourself again.”

“We need to talk.” Alec says, stepping forward, Magnus takes a step back, spins on his heel and heads back to the living room.

“No, we don’t.” Magnus calls, as Alec follows him down the hall.

“Magnus-“

“You know your way out.” Magnus tells him, barely resisting the urge to start day drinking, _again._

“Can you just hear me out, please?” Alec asks, coming to stand in the middle of the room. “Please?”

“Fine.” Magnus replies, against his better judgement, against the voices in his mind warning him that this one is a heartbreaker.

“I-I never stopped loving you. It was-it was never about you. I was scared, the Clave was breathing down all our necks, and after everything with Izzy, I just, I thought I was protecting my family, and I hurt you because of that.” Alec explains, Magnus rolls his eyes.

“I already know this. I’m not _actually_ an idiot, Alec. I knew it had nothing to do with me as a _person,_ and everything to do with you and your _beloved Clave,_ and the fact they’d never accept you marrying a _Downworlder_. But don’t worry, I won’t be foolish enough to say yes if you ask me again.”

“Magnus, I-I’m going to earn your forgiveness, no matter what. Because I love you, you’re my _one._ ”

“That’s-that’s great, Alec, _you’re not_. I thought you were my one, but you were just like all the rest.” Magnus says, shrugging his shoulders. “True love cannot die, and our love did.”

“Magnus-“

“Get out.” Magnus snaps, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Tell me you don’t still love me, and I’ll leave. Just tell me that you don’t love me anymore and I’ll go.” Alec pleads, Magnus takes a deep breath in and turns away. “You still love me.”

“Fine. Yes, I still love you, but news flash, Alec, I still love _Camille._ So, don’t go getting ahead of yourself. I still love George, and Etta, and Casanova, and Imasu, and Chaucer, and Freddie, and all the others over the years. You’re nothing special, Alexander. You hurt me, just as they all hurt me, you left me just as they all left me, and I still love them, just as I still love you.” Magnus states, ignoring the harsh intake of breath he hears from Alec. “Yes, I’ll always love you, but I’ll love you from afar, the way I still love Camille. Because just like her, you proved you can’t be trusted with my heart.”

“I’m sorry, I-I’m going to fix this.” Alec promises, his voice breaking, but Magnus just laughs.

“You can’t, Alec. I was your first relationship, so maybe that’s why you can’t understand this, but you broke us. We talked about our future, you proposed to me, we had all these plans, when you broke up with me, decided you could walk away, you destroyed all those plans, too. You promised me a lifetime, and you couldn’t even give me three years. Every discussion we ever had about our future, it was meaningless to you. It meant _nothing._ Otherwise you wouldn’t have been able to walk away.”

“ _You_ walked away.” Alec retorts, defensive and angry, Magnus snorts, that was the one thing Alec chose to take from Magnus argument?

“ _You told me to leave_!” Magnus snaps, his glamour stripping itself away as his control starts to fray. “So, I did, besides, you were already married when I left, so why should you care that I didn’t stay?”

“ _Because I love you_.”

“So, _what_?” Magnus yells, the windows shattering as his magic explodes out of him in one massive shockwave, throwing Alec across the room. Magnus groans and rubs at his face, tries to rein his magic back in. “If you loved me half as much as I loved you, you wouldn’t have been able to marry Lydia. I never would have done that to _you_.” He murmurs, his voice cracking. “I never would have done that. Not to you, not to anybody.”

“I had a duty.” Alec snaps, pushing himself to his feet, brushing down his clothes.

“Yeah, that doesn’t absolve you of anything, Alec. It’s nice to know you still use the Clave to justify your actions. I dodged a seraph blade with you.” Magnus exclaims with a sardonic little laugh.

“You told me you might be able to forgive me, one day. How am I supposed to earn your forgiveness when you won’t even see me?” Alec pleads, desperate and afraid and Magnus feels something in him break.

“You _wait!_ You wait until I’m ready to look at you without wanting to throw you out of a window. You wait until I’m ready to look at you without wanting to erase every single memory I have of our time together. You wait until I’m ready to look at you without wanting to close my heart to the world forever. You just _wait!_ This isn’t about _you,_ you’re the one who decided to walk away, you’re the one who decided I meant nothing to you, so you don’t get to barge back in now and expect me to just take you back! This isn’t about you! If you _ever_ want there to be an **_us_** _ever_ again, you **_wait!_** ”

“I thought-“

“You thought you could go off and marry Lydia and I’d be here waiting for you, well you thought **_wrong_** , Alec.” Magnus tells him, clenching his hands into fists and turning his back. “You thought so wrong, and you know what? I didn’t spend the last five years pining after you in Edom. Oh, there was a time where you were everything that I wanted, and there were days where I couldn’t figure out how I was supposed to live without you, but I got over it! _I had to._ Because you decided you could live without me, you decided I didn’t matter to you, so I had to get over you, too.”

“I never got over you.” The Shadowhunter argues, and Magnus prays for patience.

“Then that’s your problem.” he snaps, shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head. “That’s your problem, not mine, and you’re not going to make it my problem, because you’re the one who chose to walk away, not me. You’re the one who chose to get married, not me.”

“Magnus-“

“You’re the one who decided that _we weren’t enough._ I didn’t come back from Edom for _you._ Brooklyn has been my home for longer than you’ve been born, for longer than your family has lived here. You took my return as some sort of permission to try and woo me back, but I fell for your charms and lies once, and I’m not a big enough fool to fall for them again."

"Magnus-"

"You told me you'd be with me until the day you died. You told me that we'd make the most of your forever. You told me that whatever came, we'd face it together. Well, you're a liar, Alec." Magnus murmurs, tears welling in his eyes. "I gave you my heart and all you did was break it. I knew you'd break my heart one day, but I figured there'd be a span of decades before that happened. I figured we'd probably have gotten married, adopted a few kids and raised them together. I figured we'd have gone off and explored the world together, lived a fantastic life together, eventually settled down somewhere to live out the last of your days. You proposed to me and I thought I knew what I was doing when I agreed. Everyone warned me against you, told me you were a Shadowhunter and I couldn't trust you. 'You don't know my Alexander', I told them, naive, and stupid, and foolish in love. They told me you were mortal and I'd lose you. 'I know, but as the saying goes, it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all', I told them, naive, and stupid, and foolish in love."

"Magnus-"

"You broke up with me and for a few minutes I honestly thought you'd stabbed me. I couldn't breathe and my whole chest felt like it was on fire, the world started to spin and I couldn't think straight. When I remembered how to breathe, you were gone, and Cat showed up asking me about the wedding the Institute had just announced for you and I thought I'd die, Alec. Really, truly thought I wouldn't be able to go on." he says, ignores the gasp he hears from his former lover. "Cat and Ragnor stuck with me, Ragnor put me back on solid ground when I tried to throw myself off the Brooklyn Bridge, Cat held me as I cried myself to sleep. But... I think a tendency towards suicide runs in my family." he states, softly, shrugging his shoulders.

"My mother killed herself, and I've tried a few times, too. Almost stepped through a portal into the heart of a volcano on your wedding day." Magnus explains, gives a bitter little laugh. "Then my dad sent me a message, offered me Edom if I'd rule by his side, and I figured there was nothing here for me anymore, so why not? Packed up all my people who wanted to come with me, broke Dot and the other warlocks out of Valentine's little ship, and we went to Edom, built ourselves new lives." He turns, stares at Alec, who looks absolutely devastated. "If you want to earn my forgiveness, you can be patient and wait until I’m ready.” Magnus says, forming a portal and all but throwing it at Alec. “Shadowhunters aren’t welcome in my home **_anymore!_** ”

* * *

“Magnus!” Alec yells, as he’s suddenly standing in his office, breathing heavily.

“Didn’t go so well, huh?” his wife’s voice asks from the doorway, Alec sighs.

“No.” he answers, closing his eyes and trying to calm down. “He hates me.”

“I’d hate you too, if I was him.” Lydia answers, he turns to frown at her, she shrugs. “I wasn’t aware things were so serious between the two of you or I’d have kicked your fucking ass for _ever_ proposing to me.”

“What?”

“I was engaged once before you, Alec, remember? The idea that you’d throw your love aside just to do a duty to the Clave is… well it- it’s not admirable, is it? It’s not even loyal, either. Because you had a responsibility to the Clave, and you had a responsibility to him, and you picked the one you hated the most. You weren’t even loyal to yourself.” Lydia says, shaking her head. “Now we’re in a mess and I don’t know how to fix it.”

“I don’t think we can. Asmodeus and Lucifer were here.” Alec mumbles, rubbing his eyes and sighing deeply. “From what I can gather, the Princes have risen.”

“So, it’s the end of days?” Lydia asks, her voice shaking.

“I think so. I think I did this, Lydia.” He whispers, feels the truth of that statement deep within his heart, within his soul. “Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.”

* * *

 _It took so long just to feel alright,_  
_Remember how to put back the light in my eyes._  
_I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed,_  
_'Cause you broke all your promises._  
_And now you're back,_  
_You don't get to get me back._  
_You're gonna catch a cold,_  
_From the ice inside your soul._  
_Don't come back for me,_  
_Don't come back at all._  
~Jar of Hearts, Christina Perri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer and Asmodeus visit to Alec is the same day as the whole Vice war, and this chapter occurs the day after.


	5. And I Will Try to Fix You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Warning: Attempted Suicide, discussion of suicide
> 
> Me: *should be writing Tell Me All About the Ocean*  
> Also me: *binge watching movies I've been meaning to watch for like two years*  
> Also me: Oh yeah... *writing this fic and listening to my Break Up Malec playlist...*
> 
> I've also decided that I'm going to do two alternate endings for this fic. One 'happy' and one not so 'happy'. Haven't decided how exactly I'm gonna go about that but I'll figure it out!!! :D

_When you try your best, but you don't succeed._   
_When you get what you want, but not what you need._   
_When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep._   
_Stuck in reverse._

_When the tears come streaming down your face,_   
_When you lose something you can't replace._   
_When you love someone but it goes to waste,_

_Could it be worse?_  
~Fix You, Coldplay

* * *

“Cousin?” Magnus pauses for a second, before swirling his drink, listening as Luna’s footsteps sound behind him, making their way to the balcony. “Ragnor said he’ll be by later.”

“Oh?” Magnus asks, kicking the chair beside him out from under the table so Luna can sit in it, his cousin sinks gracefully down on the cushion and huffs at him.

“Apparently there wasn’t as much to do at the Spiral Labyrinth as expected.” Luna answers, shrugging her shoulders, Magnus raises an eyebrow at her and she just smiles.

“And it has nothing to do with the fact you told him about Cupid?” Magnus questions, Luna hums at him and looks away, conjuring up a far too bright cocktail to sip at.

“Madzie offered to set him on fire.” Luna finally admits, the glee evident in her voice.

“She would.” Magnus replies amused, as he thinks of the little girl who is now no longer so little. “Do you think we ruined her, raising her in Edom?”

“I was raised in Hell and I turned out fine.” Luna says, narrowing her eyes, Magnus snorts.

“Fine is not a term I would use to describe you, my dear.”

“Well, I suppose you have a point. What happened to your windows?” she questions, changing the subject and looking at Magnus’ glassless windows, the shards sparkling in the daylight. Magnus huffs and rubs his eyes. “Oh.” Luna exclaims, making a face.

“What is that supposed to mean?” 

“Cupid. You know our dads are _going_ to ruin his life, right?”

“Do not remind me. Alec has decided that he’s going to win me back somehow.”

“Ugh.”

“Yes, my thoughts exactly. My dear, remind me never to fall for Shadowhunters again.”

“Done.”

* * *

Awareness is hazy, the feeling that he’s not alone, that he is awake but cannot move and there is something on his chest, making it hard to breathe and he can hear a strange chattering sound, like the scurrying of mice. He struggles, fights to move, but can’t.

“It’s been awhile since I’ve been free.” A terrifying voice states from above him, Alec opens his mouth to scream but no noise comes out. “I’ve got a treat for you.” Alec’s vision swirls and he feels like he’s falling, when he stops, he’s breathing heavily, and surrounded by a familiar setting.

The loft.

* * *

_“Come on, baby, you have to eat.” Catarina Loss’ voice sounds, Alec spins towards it immediately, to find Magnus curled up on the couch in the loft, staring up at the ceiling while Catarina gently jostles him. “Come on, Magnus.”_

_“Go away, Cat.” Magnus mumbles, unblinking._

_“No. If I leave, I’m going to start a war.” Cat replies, sinking to her knees with a dejected sigh. “I know how you feel, Magnus. But you can’t do this.”_

_“I was stupid.”_

_“We’re all stupid sometimes, my darling.” An unfamiliar voice states, Alec turns to frown at the tall, skinny man standing in a dark corner, Alec hasn’t seen him before in person, but he’s sure from memory that this is Ragnor Fell, the former High Warlock of London. “Don’t make me use my magic on you, my dear boy.”_

_“What’s the point?” Magnus whispers, but he pushes himself up, and turns to accept the small bowl of fruit that Cat pushes into his hands. “Maybe Camille was right.” He says, as he nibbles at a slice of apple._

_“Don’t you start emulating that bitch, Magnus.” Cat admonishes, shaking her head. “Your love is beautiful, it is glorious, and someday you’ll find your True Love. You thought it was Lightwood, and you were wrong, and that’s okay, Magnus. You just have to get back up, figure yourself out, and love will come along again.”_

_“I’m never going to love anyone ever again.” Magnus snaps, hurling the bowl across the room and throwing himself into Cat’s arms, sobbing heavily into her neck._

_“Baby.” Cat sighs, wrapping her arms around him. “I promise it will get better, it will be okay.”_

_The world swirls around them, and suddenly Alec finds himself standing on the Brooklyn Bridge, in the middle of a dark night._

_“You promised me you wouldn’t do this again.” Ragnor’s voice calls, Alec turns, his heart stopping in his chest at the sight of Magnus standing on top of one of the archways, looking down into the water below._

_“Magnus.” Alec shouts, desperately looking for a way to get to him._

_“This world is better off without me, Ragnor.” Magnus shouts, glancing in their direction, only seeing Ragnor. “Or maybe I’m better off without the world.” He continues, turning back to the water._

_“What about me? Am I better off without you, too? My best friend? The third of our trio? What will Cat say? When I go home and tell her that I lost you?” Ragnor snaps, a portal ripping into the air beside Alec, and they both step through to find themselves behind Magnus, who doesn’t turn to look._

_“You tell her that I’ve left the world a better place.” Magnus answers, before throwing his arms wide and stepping off the bridge. Alec screams, howling Magnus’ name as Ragnor rushes forward, magic crackling at his fingers. Alec watches in horrified fascination as Ragnor slowly lifts Magnus back up onto the archway. Magnus collapses to his knees, sobbing, once he’s back on solid ground._

_“Don’t you dare do that to me again!” Ragnor hisses, dropping down beside Magnus and wrapping him up in his arms. Magnus turns to him, crying heavily and apologizing over and over and over again while Ragnor hushes him and whispers sweet nothings. Quickly, Ragnor forms a portal to whisk them away, leaving Alec standing alone on the top of the Brooklyn Bridge, weeping._

_The world swirls and Alec finds himself amongst ruins and a world of fire._

_“Dad.”_

_“My boy, it’s wonderful to see you again, but the circumstances could be better.” Alec turns towards the voices, seeing what he expects to see, Asmodeus and Magnus. They’re leaning against each other tightly, their cat’s eyes identical and glinting in the light._

_“Go ahead and say, ‘I told you so.’” Magnus mumbles, clenching his fingers in his dad’s shirt._

_“We all make mistakes, my sweet boy. The worst thing you could ever do is close yourself off from love, never let anyone in. You forget to see the world as it truly is, Magnus. You forget to see the beauty, the wonder, the majesty. If you were not supposed to love, Little Warrior, you wouldn’t have been born with the ability.” Asmodeus answers, squeezing Magnus tightly, then turning to guide him towards an intact building Alec can see in the distance. “Your time here will do you good, put that Shadowhunter behind you, find yourself again, and I have so much to teach you. Magic beyond your wildest dreams.”_

_“Did you love my mother?” Magnus asks, as he allows his father to lead him away, Alec following a few steps behind._

_“I did. She did not know the man she had fallen in love with was not of her world and when I learned that she was pregnant, I left as soon as I could. Least the Shadowhunters find out about us, about her, about_ you _.” Asmodeus replies, with a little spring in his step. “Your mother was beautiful, inside and out, and I loved her more than I think I should have. It broke my heart to leave, but I had to.”_

_“You should have told her.” Magnus mumbles, coming to a stop, Asmodeus stopping just a step ahead of him. “She finally figured out what my eyes meant and she killed herself.”_

_“Yes, and I regret that every day, Magnus. But, had I told her, do you think you would be here?”_

_“No.”_

_“When you love someone and they love you, it doesn’t negate the fact that sometimes you make the wrong decisions. I thought about telling your mother a thousand times, but something held me back every time, then she told me she was pregnant and that’s when I knew I could never tell her.”_

_“How did you walk away?” Magnus questions, voice little more than a whisper as he wipes tears from his eyes. “Why couldn’t you figure out how to make it work? Why did you have to leave?”_

_“I loved her, too much to stay. Too much to endanger her more than I already was. I loved you, too much to endanger you, unborn though you were. At the time of your birth, it was a common practice among Shadowhunters to murder warlocks in the womb if they could successfully locate them. Greater demons leave signs of their comings and their goings, and had someone been looking, mine wouldn’t have been hard for them to spot.”_

_“Are there any good Shadowhunters?” Magnus asks, bitter and sad.  
_

_“Some. But I’ve only heard of them in stories.”_

_“I hate them. All of them.”_

_“So, do I. But they are not here and we are, so let's forget about them. Come on, I have a spell to teach you.”_

_"Is it how to go back in time and stop my past self from being a lovesick fool?" Magnus asks, sarcastically, doesn't expect the serious answer his father gives him._

_"Sadly not, but I can teach you that, too, if you'd like?"_

_"What?" Magnus exclaims, Alec equally as horrified and surprised._

_"I'm a greater demon, love, remember? A fallen angel? A prince of hell? I do as I please, and as my son, so do you. Time folds before me like a sheet of paper should I will it, I can teach you that."_

_"I'll think about it."_

_"As you wish."_

* * *

The world swirls as Magnus and his father begin to walk away again and Alec suddenly finds himself back in his bedroom, light streaming through the cracks in the blinds and that presence on his chest is no longer there. Alec sits up in his bed, breathing heavily and tries to figure out if it was a dream he saw, or memories until a voice leaves no doubt in his mind.

“I’ll be seeing you.” That voice from before says from the shadows, the one that had belonged to the being that had been on his chest.

Alec shivers.

* * *

_Tears stream down your face,_   
_When you lose something you cannot replace,_   
_Oh and tears stream down your face._

_Tears stream down your face,_   
_I promise you I will learn from all my mistakes,_   
_The tears stream down your face._

_Lights will guide you home,_  
 _And ignite your bones,_  
 _And I will try to fix you._  
~Fix You, Coldplay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Points for anyone who figured out that the thing that 'attacked' Alec is a Mara, a Scandinavian memory deamon, and where the word 'Nightmare' comes from.


	6. Down to Earth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Ragnor, Raphael, Cat, and Elias make brief appearances, and Alec and Lydia suffer for the Clave's stupidity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Raphael finally made an appearance! YAY :D And the first part of this chapter probably should have been at the end of the last one, oops.
> 
> I've actually started writing the happy ending, which is optional, as it'll be in a new story.

_It seems like right from the moment of your birth,_   
_Someone's been needing to bring you down to earth._   
_Lost up in your atmosphere of self entitlement,_   
_That broken halo on your head is hardly heaven sent._

_Look down on those with their fingers in the dirt,_  
 _We look up and see that your own life is inert._  
 _Sidetracked by your self-important, Babel-building schemes,_  
 _But broken wings won't let you fly above all your broken dreams._   
~Celldweller, Down to Earth

* * *

"Well, this place looks exactly the same as we left it.” Magnus smiles at the unexpected voice and turns to frown at his guest.

“I’ve redecorated.” He points out, amused, Ragnor shrugs.

“Didn’t notice. Where is the blonde one?” Ragnor asks, throwing himself down onto the couch next to Magnus, extracting the drink from Magnus’ hands as he does so and banishing it somewhere unknown.

“Luna has gone to see what our fathers are up to, also, I was drinking that.”

“No day drinking, we had a vote, you lost.” Ragnor replies, before sighing heavily, becoming serious. “The world is ending, Magnus, do you really want to complicate things with your Shadowhunter?”

“He’s not my Shadowhunter.” Magnus answers, swallows the _anymore_ that is like a blade to his heart. “I feel a little guilty that instead of just having a rebound like everyone else, I started Armageddon…”

“Well, you’ve always been special.” Ragnor replies, smirking. “I’m curious what a world without humans looks like. There’ll be no new warlocks, vampires, or werewolves. Eventually, I guess only the fae will remain.”

“Guess so.”

“Do you think we should stop it?” Ragnor asks, snuggling into Magnus’ side.

“No.” Magnus says, shaking his head. “Shadowhunters were created to protect our world from demons. Let’s let them do their actual job for once.” Magnus answers, knowing that Edom had Shadowhunters once, and they'd lost to the Asmodai and, later, the Lilim.

“Right, even if that means watching this world burn?”

“We made our choice, Ragnor. When we went to Edom and we stayed there even after it was explained to us that we risked freeing the Princes and the Horsemen. We made our beds, my friend.” Magnus answers, his friend just sighs.

“So, we did.” Ragnor agrees, he and Magnus both glancing up when they hear a portal forming, Cat steps out with a heavy sigh and collapses down on the couch on Magnus’ other side, snuggling in.

“Remind me how much trouble children are the next time I decide to adopt.” Cat whines, Magnus giggles while Ragnor rolls his eyes. “At least Iris’ sentence is over and she can finally pull her weight as Godmother.”

* * *

Since Magnus left five years earlier, Alec’s sleep schedule has been erratic and for the most part, unsuccessful, and now it’s made even worse by his nightly visitor. According to his readings, his visitor is a Mara, or its cousin the Alp. They were banished from the human plane centuries ago by Shadowhunters in Scandinavia, but the records were destroyed in a great fire at the Copenhagen Institute over fifty years ago. Now there were only sparse references to them in the database, and nothing on how to banish them or ward them away. So, Alec keeps dreaming, of Magnus and his time in Edom.

“I must thank you.” His visitor states, from their perch on Alec’s chest, Alec’s so used to that horrible feeling in his chest, that horrible fear. “Had you not been such a fool, my siblings and I would still be trapped in our various hells. Perhaps I should be nice this evening.” The voice murmurs, and Alec finds himself falling.

* * *

_He jerks upwards, finds himself on the ground in Edom, breathing heavily and he takes a moment to catch his breath and stop shaking, when he finally does, he turns to observe his surroundings, finds Magnus on the other side of a boiling lake._

_“I’m not above going and murdering that fool.” Elias says, sinking down beside Magnus on the edge of what can only be the ruins of a pier, the water bubbling beneath them._

_“What’s that going to solve?” Magnus asks, tossing a pebble in the water and watching it skip along the surface. “I was the fool here, Elias. Why would a Shadowhunter ever love me?”_

_“Because you’re wonderful.” Elias answers, leaning into his side. “You’re kind, and beautiful, and magically powerful, and anyone who can spend as much time with you as Alexander Lightwood did and somehow decide to leave you behind, is a fool.” Magnus pauses, listens to Elias speak and lets a pebble spin above the palm of his hand with magic as silence descends between them._

_“He did love me.” Magnus finally admits, watching the pebble slowly rotating. “I’ve been trying to pretend that he didn’t, but he did. I could see it and I loved him, Elias. But clearly, he loves the Clave more, so, what am I supposed to do now? What am I supposed to do with that?” Magnus asks, a bitter smile on his face as he clenches his fingers over the pebble, he sighs and turns his hand, lets the dust fall from between his fingers._

_“You accept it and you move on, knowing to be more careful next time.” Luna states as she appears out of a portal behind them, she presses her hands down on Magnus’ shoulders and gives them a squeeze. “Come on, your father’s going to teach you how to call on Edom’s magic to supplement your own.”_

_“Okay.” Magnus answers, sighing heavily and climbing to his feet, he glances once at the boiling water, then turns, places his hand in Luna’s and lets her lead him away._

* * *

_Alec looks around the unfamiliar bedroom he finds himself in and isn’t surprised to find Magnus and Cat lying on the king-sized bed, passing a ball of fire back and forward above them with their magic._

_“I can go murder him, you know.”_

_“Why does everyone keep saying that? That won’t make me feel better!”_

_“It’d make_ us _feel better.” Cat answers, sulking. “Why don’t you go hook up with a nice Warlock? Hadrian’s free.”_

_“Draco has been on a campaign to get into Hadrian’s pants since long before the fall of Rome. I doubt he’ll appreciate me encroaching on his territory.” Magnus points out with a little laugh, Cat huffs._

_“That’s true.”_

_“But I could happily chase Miko around all seven hells. She’s vicious!” Magnus exclaims, with a grin, Cat snorts._

_“Miko bats for the other team, my friend. You aren’t her type.”_

_“Oh, how sad.”_

_“Merlin-“_

_“Is absolutely gone on Arthur, as you well know.”_

_“Olorin?”_

_“Swore off magicals after that mess with Curumo.”_

_“Dot?”_

_“Recovering from that bullshit with Valentine.”_

_“Rowena?”_

_“Making eyes at Uncle Gabriel.”_

_“What, no! Since_ when _?! What? Huh... so then, I guess, Amora?”_

_“Chasing after Thor and Loki, as usual.”_

_“Hmm, Magnus why do you know these things?” Cat asks, frowning, Magnus shrugs. “Right, then what about Jack?”_

_“Which Jack, my dear?”_

_“Harkness.”_

_“He’s far too taken with his darling Welshman. Why are you wanting me to fall into bed with someone else, anyway?”_

_“You’ll stop moping.”_

_“Of course, he won’t, Cat.” Alec turns at the familiar voice, watches as Ragnor wanders into the room, face in a book. “Sweet Magnus can mope over anything.”_

_“That’s not fair.” Magnus argues, then shrieks when Ragnor’s magic lifts him and Cat up in the air. Cat yelling at Ragnor in what Alec thinks might be a long dead language. Ragnor climbs into the middle of the bed and settles down, the book hovering in the air above him as he sighs contentedly, before releasing the other two warlocks, who fall back onto the bed with barely a sound. “I hate it when you do that.” Magnus mutters, Cat laughs._

_“I’ll set you on fire next time, Ragnor.” She promises, the elder warlock shrugs his shoulders, unconcerned._

_“Magnus, darling, Dany is free, who wouldn’t want to shag the Mother of Dragons?” Ragnor points out, Magnus groans and tries to suffocate himself with a pillow._

_“She’s not free, her and Jon are just taking a break for the time being, whilst Drogo is off fighting Shadowhunters, and anyway, I’m perfectly capable of finding my own bed partners.” He states, voice muffled by the pillow, Alec has to move closer just to hear._

_“Good. Then find one.”_

* * *

_"I said a ‘_ nice warlock _’, what part of ‘_ nice warlock’ _sounds like grumpy fae-king of the goblins?” Cat asks, Alec sinks down onto the ground and puts his head in the palm of his hands as the world seems to form around him, a beautiful forest, surrounding an idyllic lakeside. Magnus, Cat, and Ragnor lying around the lake in various stages of undress._

_“Hmm, Jareth and I are merely friends with benefits.” Magnus answers, amused, Alec frowns, but has already learnt that no one can see him here, no one can hear him, he doesn’t exist so what is the point in protesting?_

_“Jareth hasn’t fallen into bed with anyone since dear little Sarah got her silly little self lost in a string of death and reincarnation.” Ragnor points out, swiping the alcoholic drink from in front of Magnus’. “No day drinking.”_

_“Jareth’s decided he can only be rejected so many times before he takes the hint.” Magnus replies, shrugging his shoulders, then he glares at Ragnor and huffs. “I swear this ‘no day drinking’ rule is unfair, I was absent from the vote!”_

_“Such a shame.” Cat mocks, with a laugh. “Next time show up for voting.”_

_“Fine.” Magnus answers, rolling his eyes. “Anyway, Jareth and I are incompatible long term, he wants to get married and raise a horde of children and I’ve decided I’m never going to agree to marriage again, so…”_

_“A horde of children?” Ragnor asks, glancing up from a spell book, an odd look on his face. “A_ whole _horde?”_

 _“He_ is _the_ Goblin King, _besides, We’re immortal, Ragnor, no such thing as enough children.” Cat says, grinning. “Though, one child at a time is enough for me, thank you.”_

 _“Ugh me, too.” Magnus agrees, picking up pebbles and starting to skip them across the water. "How_ is _Madzie?"  
_

* * *

“We have a problem.”

Alec groans at the sound of his soon to be ex-wife’s voice as he opens his eyes and sits up, pulling a sheet of paper from his face.

“What now?” he asks, groggy and ready to fall back to sleep, knowing his only undisturbed sleep comes during the day. The last few weeks had been full of problems, demon attacks everywhere he looked, and the odd attack from a warlock with a bone to pick with the Clave.

“Dracula is back.” Lydia explains, Alec blinks at her, his sleepy brain trying to comprehend what she’s saying.

“I thought he was long dead?” he finally asks, Lydia shakes her head.

“Apparently he’s been sleeping, waiting for the time when his people would need him.” She explains, patiently, though Alec can hear the tension in her voice.

“So, why do they suddenly need him now?” Alec asks, frowning, confused as to why the vampires wouldn’t need their leader when they were busy being killed for their fangs over a century ago.

“Well, apparently the vampires have never been chipped like dogs before.” Lydia answers, crossing her arms over her chest. Alec huffs and bangs his head on the desk.

“We told them it was a bad idea.” He mumbles into the desktop, listens to Lydia sighing.

“Yeah, well, they didn’t listen, and this is the reality we live in.” she states, shaking her head. “Worse, according to our sources, Magnus adopted Raphael when he was first turned.”

“I know.”

“And you don’t think Magnus is going to have a problem with us chipping his son?” Lydia exclaims, Alec’s entire body freezes and he sucks in a breath.

“We’re dead.”

“We were already dead! Now we’re double dead, triple dead, we’re just utterly fucked!” she snaps, before letting out a sigh that comes out more as a shriek of frustration. “There’s too many demons, and if the warlocks and the vampires both rise up against us, we’re done, Alec.”

“I know, we just have to accept it, and deal with things as they come. We can’t win, Lydia, and the Clave will never give in.”

“I know.”

* * *

Magnus wakes with a groan and rolls over when the wards sound in his mind to let him know someone is at his door. He finds Ragnor watching him, but Magnus pats his arm and mumbles for him to go back to sleep, before rolling himself out of bed and summoning his dressing gown, slowly putting it on over yesterday’s clothing as he wanders to the door, yawning and trying to rub the sleep from his eyes. He pulls the door open and blinks in surprise.

“Raphael.” He whispers, staring at his son in amazement.

“Papa.” Raphael answers, before reaching out and wrapping his arms around the warlock, clutching him tight. “Papa.” He whispers, breath hitching.

“Oh, my boy, I’ve missed you.” Magnus admits, gently pulling Raphael inside and shutting the door, Raphael clings tighter to Magnus when Magnus tries to let go, and the warlock frowns. “Raphael?”

“Please. Get it out, papa.” Raphael pleads, his voice trembling, his breath stuttering against Magnus’ neck.

“Raphael, get what out? What’s wrong?” Magnus asks, fear and concern welling within him like a dam has burst. Suddenly Raphael’s hands are grabbing his left one, and bringing it up to Raphael’s neck, pressing Magnus’ hand flat against the skin.

“Get it out, please, get it out.” Raphael begs, bloody tears leaking from his eyes. “Please.”

Magnus’ hand glows as his magic surges forward, searching and immediately slamming up against an object that should not be there. He hisses in anger and tears a small hole in Raphael’s neck with magic, summoning the item out and healing the wound, all within a matter of seconds. He looks down at the tiny little chip in his hand and his magic whips the air around him in a frenzy, the anger burning its way through him.

“Thank you.” Raphael exclaims on a relieved breath, sinking to his knees.

“Who did this?” Magnus asks, glaring down at the chip, while reaching out with his free hand to squeeze Raphael’s shoulder gently. “Who did this?” he repeats, Raphael breaths in deeply and looks away.

“Shadowhunters.” He finally answers and doesn’t even flinch when Magnus’ magic explodes out of him in a great wave.

“Stay. Here.” Magnus grinds out through clenched teeth, a portal ripping itself into being before him, he glares once more at the offending chip, before clenching his fingers around it and stepping through the portal.

* * *

Alec looks up from his mountain of paperwork to find the Institute shaking around him, the walls glowing an eerie blood red with black smoke leaking from cracks running along the walls, ceiling and floors. Slowly he climbs to his feet, looking around him, wide eyed and terrified.

“ _Alexander Gideon Lightwood!”_ a familiar voice shouts, echoing through the Institute, Alec shivers. “I protect your Institute, protect your people, after _everything_ and this is how you thank me?”

“Magnus.” Alec whispers, rubbing at his head and closing exhausted eyes, searching for the will to go out and face a Magnus Bane that he’s never seen before. He’s heard the stories, knows some of what makes Magnus so respected amongst his own kind, but Alec’s never seen it.

“So keen to interrupt my day, but now you won’t even face me?” Magnus voice snaps, Alec takes a deep breath in and lets it out slowly, shaking his head, tries to clear the muddled thoughts and find a viable way to deal with the situation, coming up empty. “Very well. You are no longer _mine_ to protect.”

Suddenly the shaking becomes almost unbearable, Alec feels like his bones might just shake themselves apart. Then, it stops, as suddenly as it began and the glowing fades away as the alarms start blaring around the Institute, notifying them that the wards have been breached. Alec knows without having to look, without having to be told, he knows that there is no breach. Knows that there are no wards protecting their Institute, none, not anymore.

* * *

 

 _You go on pretending that you own the universe,_  
 _We'll all be here watching as you're falling down to earth._  
 _Won't matter how high you climb,_  
 _When rules of gravity apply._  
 _Won't matter how hard you've tried,_  
 _When your ego and earth collide._  
 _It's time for someone to bring you down to earth._  
~Celldweller, Down to Earth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, so I've had a rough start to 2019, in summary: my cousins in hospital and has been since before Xmas, she's no longer in serious condition, so I'm hopeful she'll be alright. Our house flooded twice before Xmas in a big storm we had, so all our carpet had to be ripped up and I was sleeping in a tent/on the floor in the lounge upstairs for a little while. My car got rear-ended before Xmas and had to be written off, so I've been car searching as well as sorting out insurance (yay) and we had about 15 people staying in our flooded out house over Xmas, so I've been stressed out and pissed off for the last few weeks and only getting back to normal this week, so apologies for the delay, but I can't even promise the next chapter will be soon, as I'm currently attempting to get fit and that's taking up a lot of my time.


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